A decision I ought to do now.

I have been thinking a lot..

Damn true they say that darkness is a place that'd make you to ponder and yourself is your biggest enemy that time.

I am writting this as the night has ended and a new day started yet the day is still as dark as yesterday. I will end what I have started. And I will end it good as much as how I started it.

It would require a lot.. so much that I have to give in half of what I have now as an exchange to my decision. Consequences would be big and I believe unchangeable which would change a huge deal in most of things in my life.

Chances will slip away but I also believe that chances are something that always pass by everyday.. there would be some to grab and hold on to someday.. I believe.. someday..

It broke my heart

Oh. It broke my heart...

Sa baru ja mesyuarat tadi.. After the meeting I was suppose to do something tapi kena cancel... oh... dia sudah janji mo buat tu transfer after the meeting but tiba2 kena cancel. It broke my heart. I feel dissapointed juga lah..

Gara2 sa lewat ja? But I thought we were supposed to do the transfer after the meeting. Bukan sebelum meeting. Kalau ya pun. He should have told me awal2 yang it is before and not after the meeting.

Mimang confirm dia merajuk just because I was late. But seriously? He should have known better. Haaish.. It is ok lah.. so kena postponed entah bila. Sa macam datang malas sudah.

I dont know.. sometimes I think.. am I being too sensitive juga? Why should I feel so anyway kan? Pelik oh. Yay. Gosh. It's so weird. Mmmm... Maybe I am being too sensitive juga. Dia pun sensitive also. Haiyo.. but what to expect? Its ok lah.. haiyaa.. Let it go John.. it is time to just leave it behind.. Just leave it alone. It'll be fine.

Birthday Present

No one knows except his father that actually I was the one who personally choose and bought the phone accesorries that my student loves so much.
My student's father asked me to make his old samsung s III glimmering so that he can give to his son. So I personally choose the pirate of carribean cover with 3D effect, colourful gliterring screen protector and personalise the details on the phone.

In the evening his father presented the surprised birthday gift to this little nice guy and well. The surprise seriously worked!

*what to expect from an about-to-turn 13 years old boy right?

This boy was so happy, not to mention the extra happiness when he got few notes of RM50 as an additional gift aside from the Samsung S III.

*lets just hope he'll not become a spoiled little brat in the future.

So, back to my point! He was so happy. His smiles curved a pretty long line on his face and hardly to relax. Seeing him so happy that moment made me think slash (/) ponder. Was he happy because of the money given or the depth of affection he thought was from his father when he saw that everything about the phone was perfectly matched his soul.

And i thought further... I dont want a dad like that. And I dont want to be a dad of that type. Cheating your love to your children. When you never really mean it... It was sad moment for me. Not because of wanting compliments but because it wasnt true enough from the father.. no one knows I did everything. If that little boy knew.... his thought of his father as hero would break to ruins... pity.

*ok. Enough of sadness. Happy birthday to my student anyway. :)

What needed to be said had been said.

Biar.... Biar satu kali sa terus terang and clear and buat dia berfikir... Urang bilang better lagi orang dekat yg terus terang seterang-terangnya daripada orang lain yang terus akan kasih biar kamu selepas kasih hantam tu realiti di muka..

Segala apa yang sa buat dan cakap sekarang mungkin agak melampau dan cross the limits. Bukan agak. Tapi mimang melampau pun. Tapi biar ni sekali ja (tidak diulang lagi) tapi mampu beri impak dengan cara pemikiran dia ni. Peduli lah kejam sa cakap hari ni sebab kebaikan besok harinya adalah lebih besar.

Sa tidak menyesal dan sa lega akhirnya setelah lama dapat juga segalanya terungkai. Masa utk ko ja tu berfikir betul2 dan berubah. Sa doa2 lah ko masih boleh fikir dgn waras and sedar dengan diri sendiri. Kalau tidak pun, masa akan ungkai segalanya nanti. Mungkin presepsi dan kesimpulan sa sekarang salah di masa hadapan nanti. Mungkin juga betul. Apapun yang penting adalah masa sekarang yang nyata.

What needed to be said had been said. Sa mo tutup rapat2 apa yang ada hari ni. ※

Test

Test

Thank You MKTO

Hahahaa..

Lama juga sudah sa tidak ketawa begini lucu.. hahaa..
sa rasa geli hati pula tengok ni intro lagu. dia tolak tu president pi tepi. hahaa... lucu.. geli sa hati sa.. haha.. i love this video clip and song. haha... it just made my day. ='D

Yo, this one right here is for all the drop-out-of-schoolers.
The future cougars. The Mary Jane abusers.
The ones that chose to be losers, for all the Misfit Kids and total outcasts MKTO.
This one's for you role models.

We are the ones, the ones you left behind.
Don't tell us how, tell us how to live our lives.
Ten million strong we're breaking all the rules.
Thank you for nothing, cause there's nothing left to lose.

Thank you for feeding us years of lies.
Thank you for the wars you left us to fight.
Thank you for the world you ruined overnight.
But we'll be fine, yeah we'll be fine.

Thank you for the world you broke,
Like yolk and it ain't no joke.
So cold and there ain't no coat,
Just me, my friends, my folks
And we gonna do what we like.
So raise that bird up high
And when they ask you why.
Just stand there laugh and smile.

We are the ones, the ones you left behind.
Don't tell us how, tell us how to live our lives.
Ten million strong we're breaking all the rules.
Thank you for nothing, cause there's nothing left to lose.

Na na na na
Na na na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na na na
(Thank you)

Thank you for the times you said, "Don't make a sound."
Thanks for the ropes you used to hold us down.
Cause when I break through I'ma use them to reach the clouds.
We ain't comin' down (Come on). We ain't comin' down (Hey).

Look, ma, I finally made it,
This world is too damn jaded.
My life is just like Vegas, go big, go home get faded.
Been a problem since '92.
Can't shut me down curfew
And them girls I'll take a few.
Do what I wanna do.

We are the ones, the ones you left behind.
Don't tell us how, don't tell us how to live our lives.
Ten million strong we're breaking all the rules.
Thank you for nothing, cause there's nothing left to lose.

Na na na na (hey)
Na na na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na na na
(Thank you)

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
From head to toe from the soul you ripped apart.
I say, "Thank you."
I say, "Thank you."
Yeah, yeah

We are the ones, the ones you left behind.
Don't tell us how, tell us how to live our lives.
Ten million strong we're breaking all the rules.
Thank you for nothing, cause there's nothing left to lose.

We are the ones, the ones you left behind.
Don't tell us how, tell us how to live our lives.
Ten million strong we're breaking all the rules.
Thank you for nothing, cause there's nothing left to lose.

(Thank you)

Na na na na (hey)
Na na na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na na na
(Thank you)

Yo if you don't like what they tell you to do, don't do it.
If you don't want to be who they want you to be, screw it.
It's your world, it's your life and they ruined it.
Role models, tune in, turn up, drop out m

Trans Pacific Partnerships

Talking about Trans Pacific Partnerships TPP, a conceived from US to penetrate small countries economics in particular governments procurements is just worrying. Malaysia Ministry of Trade and Industry claimed that negotiation of trades should be done in secret and between only personals involved. there should be no arguments or debates on the trade negotiated either public or within yhe government itself.

If this is the case, then the governments sure talked too much about transparency. Whatever the negotiations might be, we as the residents do not whether it will favor us or instead. It is the individuals involved who will decide what is good or bad for us in which I
Very much doubt. If the governments took part in the TPP, as what Tun Dr Mahathir had clearly discussed in his writing, we'd risk everything on the line in particular the government procurement. Many negotiations had been sealed by the Malaysia government and yet not one is in much favor of us in the end. Few examples to take are the treated water and raw water price deal between Malaysia and Singapore, ASEAN cars labeling and of course the unthinkable purchased of F/A-18 air craft toy (purchased without its source code).

We are unaware of what today decisions will do us many years ahead. Our politicians and economic-expert-Claimed-to-be should know better and make a fair decision for the sake of our future generation. If the governments economists and politists discuss and decide that there a way this TTP would do us good, then WE the people, the main reason of this country very existence should know know all details of it. Negotiation should not be do in secrecy. Tun Dr Maharhir quoted "we talk a lot of transparency, let us see transparency regarding TTP negotiation."